I truly believe that at the basis of any relationship is genuine chemistry, not attraction but chemistry. Chemistry is what makes you to continue to talk to person who approached you. It is the cosmic energy that draws you to a person from a across the room. Call me a romantic but chemistry is important.
Married at first site is a social experiment show where experts match people based on interviews and profiles to marry immediately upon meeting. There is a large wedding and everything. Of the nine couples over three years and three seasons, only two couples have been able to make this work. I think the reason that this doesn’t work is chemistry. Marrying a stranger is daunting and even if you are attracted to the person it is still daunting. You can find someone attractive and not feel connected to them.
The flaw in Married at First Sight is chemistry because it is something that just happens. The experts cannot predict chemistry between two people, which is the reason why everyone you’re matched with on the dating site of your choice doesn’t work out. What looks good on paper does not means it will work for you. The nuances of connection and feeling connected are so much more than personality profiles. When you have genuine chemistry with someone there is an unspoken understanding of that person. It is what makes us feel that this person is worth the trouble until proven otherwise.
There are several arguments as to why the shows premise that with expert matches, hard work on yourself you can marry a stranger isn’t working. The number one argument is lack of intimacy. Well let’s talk about that, you have cameras following you for six weeks after marrying a total stranger. Couple that with couples counseling, and romantic getaways chaperoned by show staff. It’s not an intimate experience, some people have sex and some don’t. No matter how much physical affection helps, sex and affection do not create intimacy, communication and understanding do. When you are comfortable with your partner it is easier to build on intimacy, how are you going to do that with this set up?
The other argument is they were too “intimate” too fast. I’m guessing intimate means sex… Well sex brings people closer but it doesn’t make them have an intimate connection only a physical one. Sex is also a stress reliever and I’m guessing this a stressful situation and if it makes people feel better they are a married couple.Even if you are having all of the sex a person can handle it doesn’t suggest you have chemistry, to me it says you find that person attractive, not that you feel connected.
So basically chemistry is the basis for a relationship and experts can’t fabricate it.
Love, Lust and Everything in Between 