I don’t believe in New Year’s resolutions, at least not on New Years. Many people have asked what my resolution is I didn’t really have one because I usually evaluate my life on my birthday. I don’t believe in the New Year New Me BS, but I know that new year does spark something within all of us but flipping the calendar does not solidify change; it is a gradual process that takes consistency. I always make a goal for myself on my birthday because birthdays literally mark a new year of life so it’s more significant for me.
Ironically my birthday ia almost right in the middle of the year. This year my birthday resolution was to be content being alone and making decisions with men that benefitted me in better ways. I could be alone and be ok or be in a fulfilling relationship. I began to cut ties and make space in my life for something serious and local. Although there have been some missteps, as I said before old habits die hard, I am proud of my progress so far.
For the past few years I have hung with a select group of people. I am moving on these people were cool to show me how to turn up Atlanta style and move around different groups of people. But I don’t feel that they were long term. I didn’t feel like they made me want or a need to be better; they just made me want different things. With the ending of an era comes the beginning of a new one. I feel like the last two years in Atlanta have been a transitioning phase for me. I have become more of who I want to to be in the last 6 months.
The bad habits of the past are hard to break but I am always in process, like the rest of humanity. I am learning from my mistakes and correcting them instead of justifying them. I am being self reliant and resourceful. I am learning to be mine before I am anyone elses. Looking out for myself and learning how to be alone and still, instead of having a constant companion and always on the go. By the March of 2015 I will be completely rid of the people who don’t serve a positive purpose. So by June which is my birthday month I will be on track for my birthday
New Phase better me.