I told him to show me a good time…. He took me to the movies… -___-
Archive for October, 2011|Monthly archive page
I’m completely turned on by someone being in control of me. I like men who take control, there is nothing sexier than a man confident enough to be in total control and completely satisfy me; that will make me a loyal customer. This is partly because I am a control freak I like things my way, I like for things to go the way I planned because after all I am the best planner ever. There is just something about someone telling me what to do and how to do it, as well as, what will not be allowed at that moment that makes me immediately aroused. Nothing like having to manage everything around you but for this space in time not having to worry about anything because he has taken over the task, may seem like a cop-out but I see it as release. I am not responsible for his orgasm I’m not responsible for mine, I’m not responsible for anything but to do what he says or be punished. I trust that he will not do anything that I won’t like, that I‘m not comfortable with and he never does. Always just right, the perfect mix of pleasure and pain, of the mental and physical.
There is something special about Sundays. In college I started to have Naked Sundays, with the flavor or the moment. We would lock ourselves in the apartment and have sex, eat, sleep, and repeat. Naked Sundays are all about the sex… What a way to spend the day! Get naked with someone and be ready to have sex at any moment. Clothes are not allowed, unless you have to use the stove or answer the door. Make sure you have food on deck or delivery menus so you don’t have to leave the house. On naked Sundays push the limits and try new things; the things you’ve wondered about and haven’t done or the things you’ve tried and failed at. Have sex in a different place or in a different way. Just do what is comfortable for you at that time.
It’s Sunday…. Let’s get NAKED
I remember my first hard break up after a long relationship my day asked “Were you intimate with him???” I was at first taken aback because it was my dad and the answer was of course. We had been together for years through the end of high school and the beginning of college so I didn’t think he needed to ask. I remember my Mom saying when you’re intimate the lost is greater. In this context they were talking about sex. I’m not sure I believe that sex solidifies an emotional connection as my parents implied. I think vulnerability does
Intimacy is about being vulnerable. Trusting that the people you have deep connections to, outside of family, will always have your best interest and will never intentionally hurt you. I believe that when you trust a person enough to allow yourself to be vulnerable you create intimacy. It is human nature to protect oneself whether it emotionally or physically. Intimacy may not be long lasting and it may only happen for moments at a time, but as we all know moments turn into minutes, turn into hours, turn into days, etc. Intimacy in my circle of friends seems to exist most in friendship not in relationships. It is amongst ourselves that we are completely ourselves without trying. I think that is because we are the generation of overt sexuality, instant gratification, attention deficit and last but not least divorce. We have seen intimate relationships fall apart more than stay together and people who spend more time planning a wedding than they do staying married.
The parts of relationships that create intimacy have been blurred for us. It seems that we spend more time trying to one up each other than we take getting to know each other. That we are so fond of the idea of intimacy, of being in Love, that we don’t know what it takes to have intimate connections with a significant other. This is not totally our fault as we have been bombarded with conflicting images and ideals for most of our lives. Sex has at times become a substitute for real emotional connections. Or we are so caught up in the physical that we don’t know how to be emotional. Partly because sex is instantly gratifying; no real work necessary. We are so guarded that we don’t know how to be vulnerable and we are plugged in that we don’t know how to just be… It’s kind of like intimate relationships have to sneak up on us, and we don’t even recognize when they happen.
Sex does not equate intimacy for me but everyone is different. Sex can be intimate but for the most part at this point in my life it’s just sex; no emotion necessary.